The first step in being BOLD is to believe that you are Beautiful. Yes, you can be very beautiful looking; meaning the outside package, but when people look into your eyes do they see emptiness? Real beauty comes from the inside. The way to let your beauty shine through is by first loving yourself and building up that inner beauty. Do you know of someone who lights up a room whenever they enter? They have a very sincere smile and look as if they are very glad to see you and hang out with you. They want to know all about you. They look into your eyes while they talk to you and listen and validate what you are saying. This is someone with beauty from the inside. They love themselves enough to be confident in their skin no matter what it looks like on the outside. They are a shining light of LIFE. What are you doing to fall in love with yourself? How are you nurturing and filling your heart and spirit? Be Bold and Beautiful on the inside and others will see how you show up in the world.
The second step to being BOLD is being Outgoing. When you show up at a networking event, seminar, client appointment or party give 100% to that experience. Show up with energy and enthusiasm. Create a positive vibe that attracts others to you. Be excited about your product or service so that people naturally want what you have. Ask a lot of questions and show that you love what others are saying by offering nods and agreement. People love knowing that you are excited about what they have to say. If you provide a space for them to shine and feel good they will remember that about you. Even if you are shy, you can make an effort to connect with at least one person per day. Maybe you feel safe behind your computer and you want to reach out and connect electronically when you first start reaching out. Where you are is just where you are meant to be. Where you want to go needs to be planned, support needs to be in place, and action and accountability to ensure success.
The third step to being BOLD is Loving. By coming from a place of love verses fear, you will also naturally attract positive into your life. We have all been in places of fear in our lives. If you take a moment to list all of the feelings that you have ever experienced in your life, you will be able to organize them into two categories. Give it a try. List all the feelings that you can remember having in your lifetime. (Scared, alone, happy, joyful, funny, sad, hopeless, depressed, jealous, greed, giving, empathy, etc.) Now take a look at each of the words and ask yourself, “Is this feeling based in Love or Fear?” If you can remember this simple system when having a feeling, you may be able to turn it around. Let’s take jealously for an example. If you feel jealous and say is this love or fear based, you can see that it is fear based. You can go even further by asking why? “Well, I am afraid that my partner will leave me for someone else and that will hurt.” So, the real feeling is being afraid of getting hurt, or being in fear of getting hurt. So, now turn it around to acknowledgment of a fear based feeling and see how it can be expressed in a loving way. “When you talk about Gina, I feel jealous, which is really just expressed as a fear of mine, that maybe you will like her and want to be with her instead of me.” This is a loving way to express this fear, instead of lashing out against your partner in a jealous rage. Again, when taking the first step to being bold which is being beautiful on the inside, you will have much more strength to live a loving way of life.
The final step to being BOLD is to be Direct. Not in a bitchy masculine way, but in a loving, I expect that you will want to make this right, kind of a way. I will illustrate this with a story. I was to make a connecting flight to Portland after landing in Dallas Fort Worth. Our plane out of Chicago was late to pick us up from the gate due to unloading passengers from an international flight. We boarded 45 minutes late. I knew that I would have a tight transfer, but I also new somehow it would all work out. We landed, I ran to the connecting flight and they had already shut the boarding doors and the woman at the counter was telling the gentleman in front of me that they were not going to get him a room due to natural causes. I patiently waited my turn and watched the man accept her excuse and book a hotel room with her on the phone for $99. I had some time to process and think. I wanted to see my family so badly that I was disappointed that I had missed my connection but I was going to stay clear headed while I was dealing with the situation. I approached the counter and stated my concern about missing my connection after running and doing my best to be there on time. She said the same to me as the man before. I assured her that it wasn’t natural causes and that I was sure that they would take care of my room for me. She said no, so I calmly thanked her for her help and asked for her supervisor. He came to the desk and essentially said the same thing, that due to natural causes they couldn’t pay for my room. I assured him that I understood that he was doing his job, but it was the airlines job to get me home and put me up if they couldn’t hold up their end of the bargain. I also stated that the hold-up was from an international flight not natural causes but that I was sure that they would take care of me and my needs this evening. I gently reached out to the supervisors hand and said, “I know that you are doing all that you can, but maybe there is someone who can do more.” He got on the phone and the problem was solved. I was direct, persistent and didn’t give up. I was direct in a loving and kind way expecting that they wanted to do the right thing. You can be this way with your children, your spouse, your friends and your business associates. Be BOLD; Beautiful, Outgoing, Loving & Direct.
Much love and support to you as you live each day in a BOLD way.
CEO, Chicks Connect Mastermind Support Network